1000 subscribers, eye surgery, dad in ER

A short musing on how REAL life gets and the silver linings that move it along.

Happy Mother’s Day! Thank you to all the Mothers on there for all that you do. You are what makes the world go round.

Dear Subscribers and future subscribers,

When I started to write The Uncommon Executive newsletter on Substack, I set 1000 subscribers as a major milestone and looked forward to it (worked towards it diligently) with much anticipation. From the various posts I read, 1000 seemed like a significant milestone. It means that you have found a decently large group of people who enjoy reading what you write, and if you got here not by pure luck, you have some growth channel that is working.

Well, after 4 live events (with Reforge, Instacart, Women Defining AI, Nancy Chu Coaching), 3 guest posts (Deb Liu, ADP List, Shyvee Shi), and 14 posts, I have hit 1000 subscribers!

I’m so grateful for the opportunity to write and interact with my subscribers and talk about what I love to talk about: career growth and leadership for women and minorities.

Except, it was quite anticlimactic. Instead, the pride and joy from the achievement have been dampened by struggles in other areas of my life.

I’m in the “sandwhich” stage of my life – with two rambunctious little ones at home and elderly parents to care for as an only child. And this past week, it’s been a meeting of many happenings all at once. When life happens at full force, I try my best to hold on, lean on others, and get through.

A few days ago, my four-year-old underwent a planned eye surgery to correct his strabismus. We intentionally did not schedule any large gatherings or trips or big work meetings before or after the surgery. We made sure we had help with childcare and there were no school holidays. The surgery was the most of a day but relatively smooth. But we were all exhausted and Adrian was emotionally very needy. I signed up for a week of stay-at-home low-activity care with my husband. This practically means a regular course of pain meds, “my eye hurts” tantrums, and wracking my brain for indoor, low-light activities that don’t strain his eyes. We also had to make sure the younger one didn’t try and bat his brother on the head while he’s down. It was a lot.

3000 miles away in California, I was having regular stressful conversations with my mom about my dad’s latest condition. My father had been dealing with stage IV colon cancer for almost two years, and his mental and physical state was deteriorating. She didn’t know what to do. This all culminated in being taken to the ER by ambulance for low oxygen levels a day after the surgery while I was out at a park with my little one. My mother does not speak English well and is unfamiliar with the details of his care. This led to a long series of late-night (Central European Time) stressful video calls about his latest advanced health directives, prescriptions, and symptoms. It was difficult to understand what was happening through broken translations and phone tag with doctors and nurses. 24 hours later, without much improvement in his condition, I got on a direct flight from Barcelona to San Francisco, canceling meetings en route. It was as if the universe knew – I was able to exchange my ticket without fees due to an airline schedule change, and there was a last-minute direct flight that opened up for a very reasonable change fee.

But here’s the silver lining: With more than 1000 subscribers, I now have the flexibility in my life to care for my kids and take off last minute across the ocean to care for a loved one. And, the outpouring of support from friends and family, near and far that I’ve received on both these fronts has been so heart-warming.

I am so grateful for everything and everyone that has gotten me to this point. I am one lucky girl indeed.

With so much love and gratitude,

Yue