How to Maximize Your Relationship with Your Manager
It does not pay to be easy to manage. Here's how to make the most of your manager relationships and say "no" effectively.
Client: The company is going through a rough period. My manager asks me to take on more projects. However, the team has a lower budget and fewer resources. I want to take on a bigger scope but I am stretched thin. I feel I should say no. But am I being difficult?
The relationship with our manager can be one of the most difficult ones to manage. As the common phrase goes: People leave managers, not companies. A manager’s job is to ensure they have the best people for each role, and that each person is as impactful to the business as possible. Your goals may differ. Sometimes, you are optimizing for your career and priorities while your manager is optimizing for the business priorities. Sometimes, you have to prioritize family or personal needs. Sometimes, that manager puts his/her professional goals above yours. There is a natural tension between “what you want” and “what your manager wants”.
When to say “no” to a stretch assignment
When there is a conflict, do you acquiesce and put your interests second, or do you advocate for your desires? How do you know when to do which?
Rule number one: For an ask that is outside of your regular duties, if it’s not a “hell yes”, then it’s a “no”. I encourage all my clients to default to “no” in the following scenarios:
Any projects that take up more than 20% outside your scope that
doesn’t align with your superpowers
Is a Non-Promotable Task (e.g. low/no impact, highly fungible task)
lacks flexibility and has strict deadlines
It has low business impact or impact is difficult to measure. Perhaps upon reflection, it doesn’t “truly” need to be done and falls in the “it’d be nice if we did this” category
This is the 4th “small task” that takes less than a week you are handling because you think it’s easier to say yes than to protect your time
Requires you to shift critical energy away from work you are already doing that is more impactful or fulfilling. Just focus on that first and get it done.
Rule number two: Know quickly what makes a “hell yes”. Know, and make sure your manager knows, in what areas you want to grow, and what type of work you are seeking. If you’re not sure, optimize for increasing your rate of learning or relationship building. A “hell yes” usually falls into one of these three scenarios: